The Bloggitudes: Nuggets Of Wisdom From The Divine All-Father Patrick

Blessed is he who knoweth to be happy, for he shalt be blessed with happiness.
Blessed is he who is nice to his neighbour, for he shalt himself be a nice neighbour.
Blessed is he who is cowardly, for he shalt be too cowardly to doeth evil.
Blessed is he who honoureth his parents, for his parents shalt thus be honoured.
Blessed is he who putteth off to tomorrow what canst be done tomorrow, for he shalt haveth to doeth little.
Blessed is he who stealeth, for he shalt haveth more than others.
Blessed is he who runneth around stark naked, for he is stark raving mad.
Blessed is he who expecteth nothing, for he shalt knoweth no disappointment.
-Hepzibah 12:1-8