Patrick Helps Realise A Lifelong Ambition

Okay, so I just realised, to my utmost horror, that I forgot to go for my physics prelim exam. I just completely forgot about it. My instinctive reaction was to cry out to Patrick for help, but then I stopped to think again – maybe HE was sending me a message again! HE did it with the chemistry exam to show me that chemistry was a waste of time, and I hate physics even more than I hate chemistry. (I had this really boring teacher before, and I suspect I was scarred for life, because now physics makes my mind shut like a clam. It even took me multiple rereads to understand the meaning of metaphysics, because every time I saw that cursed word my brain went to into standby mode.) So anyways, I quickly realised something else – one of the things on my “100 things to do before I die” list was “Get zero for a major exam”. PATRICK IS HELPING ME FULFILL MY DREAMS! Of course, I'd rather HE help me fulfill the ones higher up, like “Step on a winning lottery ticket” or “Rob a bank successfully” (just kidding! really!). But still, getting zero is pretty high on my list. It's somewhere in the mid-sixties, I think, somewhere in between “Join the mile high club” and “Finish reading Lord of the Rings without dying of boredom”. And the thing is, without this miracle that HE sent me, I probably would never have even considered getting a zero for the exam. But now that I've already missed one paper, why the hell not? HAIL PATRICK, FOR HE HAS MADE A WAY WHERE THERE IS NO WAY! PRAISE BE TO HIM, FOR HE IS ALL-KNOWING AND ALL-SEEING AND ALL-DOING AND ALL-LOVING; MAY HE CATCH MANY JELLYFISH!